Chuck vs the feeling of helplessness
by supesfan18
Summary: My version of what could have happened after episode 5.02


Forward: So I am at a yard sale last weekend, and I get this text. Supes has another story idea. In the next 10 minutes he sends me 20 texts. When it was all said and done the basic outline for the story was done. I think you'll like this little 1 shot. I know I do.-Thanks Bdaddydl, an author's note will be posted at the bottom.

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><p>"He doesn't remember who Indy is"<p>

Three Months and 5 days later

"Beep...Beep…Beep"

That was the only sound heard from the doorway. The sterility of the room was on display for all to see. It was a stark, medicinal place that most feared they would never leave once entered.

As the woman stared at her husband from the doorway there was a mix of emotions that were threatening to overtake her. She woke up alone in a cold barren bed for the second time in the last few days. She had finally gotten him to go home at the urging of their family. Correction. His family, that had become just as much a part of her as it was his. She pulled her hair back into a pony tail as she looked onto the face of the man she loved. Long were the lines that creased his brow. His now usually kept hair was beginning to show signs of the waviness that it had when they had first met, and before he had lost his innocence to her world. She moved in to comfort him as he began to stir.

Chuck could feel the hand glide up his neck, not in a sensual way but a concerned and loving way. The way only a wife a wife would touch her husband and lover. The way a wife would touch her husband when she's worried about him.

As Chuck Moved his face into her hand he heard his wife speak to him.

"Chuck. Honey, you need to come home and get a decent night's sleep."

Chuck lifted his head off of the gurney and looked into the calm serene face of his best friend. His best friend who left his team, his friends, because the Intersect had overloaded his brain faster than anyone could have predicted. After speaking with Beckman later on, they realized that there was a virus attached to the Intersect.

"Chuck, it wasn't your fault"

"Wasn't it? If I had been a better handler, I could have stopped him from going to Verbansky and seen that he needed help sooner." Chuck took a ragged breath as they discussed this _again_. "Sarah, I knew the risks and as his handler I should have forced him to take it easy. Let Ellie run more tests."

"Chuck, you know as well as I do, in the state that Morgan's mind was in, he would never have listened to you. Now please come home, you know as well as I do that it wasn't your fault. It won't do any good for Alex to come in here and see you like this again. She already has enough on her plate."

Chuck got up out of the chair and paced in front of her until he turned and for once in their relationship Sarah could not read her husband's eyes.

"Sarah, don't you see, it is my fault. My family created this, and for some reason that only god knows, I'm the only who can handle it. Why I'm the only one whose mind hasn't been corrupted. Shaw couldn't handle it, Morgan couldn't handle it, even with the governor, and that means that even Bryce couldn't have handled it if he had taken the upload. Sure, maybe he would have lasted longer, but who knows how long."

Chuck slumped to the floor and placed his head in his hands as the guilt over took him again while his body shook racked with sobs.

Sarah kneeled down in front of her husband and did the best she could to calm him down and take back control of the situation. "Shhh Chuck baby, listen to me." Sarah says as she slides her hand along the ridges of his jaw line to make him look at her eyes.

When he finally looked up Sarah's hands never left her husband, only sliding down to his shoulder "The reason it doesn't work for anyone else is simple. Bryce had the brain, but not the heart. Morgan was able to handle the power, but not the shock to his brain."Sarah took a deep breath and kissed Chuck on the lips before she continued. She could taste the salt from his tears on her lips. "Chuck, my loveable, adorable nerd you just don't get it. Don't you see the key isn't your bloodline; it's your mind and your heart. No, it's your mind, heart and soul and Chuck you have the kindest, gentlest soul of anyone I know. The kind of soul that helps bring back the soul to those who have lost them like me and Casey."

"I love you Sarah" Chuck as has he leaned in and embraced his wife.

"And I love you, baby… Now let's get you home for rest. We have a mission in a few hours."

After wiping his eyes and standing up, Chuck looked down at the bed one last time at his best friend. "I'll find a way to bring you back to us Morg." With a solitary tear running down his cheek, Sarah led him out of the room, and if he had looked back for just a second he would have seen the lone tear slide gracefully from his best friends eye.

Eventually, things would be ok.

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><p>AN: First I would like to apologize to everyone who has read this or any of my stories. I have had major writers block since about May. The story I was working on Chuck vs. the day that changed everything will be finished. I have roughly 25 pages written for the next chapter or so. A little explanation, I had just started a new job and then the news of Osama's death kind of filled a whole in my heart a bit. That said I still have the anger and resentment but between that and the news chuck would have a final abbreviated season well I hit a major block. This story came after watching ep. 5.02. My version of would could have happened next. I also have one other one shot that is currently working back and forth between betas and then I will get back to the day that changed everything because it is a story that needs to be told at least for me and my piece of mind. Again I want to thank everyone who has taken the time to read anything I have ever posted. To my wife and daughter I love you both very much. Please leave a review


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